As it is around Valentine’s Day, I would like to take three days off from the Gospel of John to provide some devotional thoughts for husbands and wives. Our basic passage is 1 Peter 3:1-7.
Husbands are called by Christ to love their
wives. Love appears in many different ways;
a reading of 1 Cor. 13 will make that clear.
So let’s see some of those varieties of love in 1 Peter. While we are at it, let’s also remember the
other great “love chapter” (1 John 4), where we see that God is love and that
our ability to love is bound up in the fact that He loved us first. What we see Peter calling for in a husband,
the husband will see in God’s love for him.
·Provide your wife with
SECURITY. What we are talking about is
to “never leave thee nor forsake thee” (Heb. 13:5). One of the greatest passages on this aspect
of God’s love is Rom. 8:31-39. In 1
Peter 3:7 it is seen in the phrase, “dwell with them.” This involves a compound word, one word, that
is translated “dwell with.” It’s not “dwell
over” as her lord but dwell with, alongside her, as her companion. And it’s not just never divorcing her. It’s never withholding any of your love or
blessing. She should never doubt your
love.
·Provide your wife with
CONSIDERATION. Peter says, dwell with
them with “understanding.” You need to
know her. A great passage about God’s
knowledge of us is Psalm 139, especially v1-6.
It means you need to be a student of your wife, to know how you can best
meet the needs in her life. It is NOT
knowing her so you know which buttons to push to manipulate her for your benefit. Furthermore, it is NOT knowing her so you
find out what’s wrong so you can judge her or win an argument. It is knowing her so your love is
intelligent. It means having a singular
focus on her, unlike any other person and especially any other woman. A home is build on knowledge and
understanding (Pr. 24:3-4).
·Provide your wife with
PROTECTION. Here we are talking about
love that is aware of the weaknesses of another person. We all have them. Peter says that the woman is the “weaker”
vessel. It means you treat her as a
special person. Weakness does not bring
criticism but compassion. If you wonder
about this, remember how God has loved and is loving you. Even when we don’t understand our weaknesses,
God attends to them for us by His Spirit (Rom. 8:26). God never allows us to get in so far over our
heads that there is no escape (1 Cor. 10:13).
Do you see that? It’s knowing
your wife so well that you are able to come along side her when she doesn’t
even know she’s in need. And because it’s
love, you are doing it without preaching to her about her weakness.
·Provide your wife with
ELEVATION. The issue here is knowing
your wife in terms of who she is before God and in Christ. Specifically, Peter says you are “heirs
together of the grace of life.” Since it’s
not clear in English, let me tell you that when Peter talks about “your prayers”
the “your” is plural. Do you realize
that you highly elevate your wife when you join her in God’s throne room? Or, when you permit her to join you in God’s
throne room? There is no higher place to
be. Furthermore, you elevate your wife
when you ask her to pray for you. And you
elevate her when you pray for her and thank God for her. Love reaches it’s peak when husband and wife are
in communion with the Father and the Son (1 John 1:3-4).
Bottom line: Husbands, love your wives,
just as Christ also loved the church and gave Himself for her (Eph. 5:25).
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